Bewildered Love
by izumie's lullaby
Summary: my first story so i hope you like it
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1- an end to begin 

Bella reached out and stroked his burning cheek.

"I can't do this anymore Jacob"

"Please I love you, I love you so much"

The tears he had wiped away so many times were now streaming down his face. He began to shake violently, he was loosing control. "You made me believe you loved me" he forced the words out through clenched teeth. Bella laid her hands on his forearms,

"Calm down"

Jacob stared at her pale hands on his russet skin and the light, cool touch that he desperately craved allowed him to gain control again "I can't go on like this" Bella continued in soft, sad tones "I love Edward, I thought when he left I could forget about him, I thought things could work between us but I was wrong, I'm so sorry but that's never going to change" She went up on tiptoe till she was inches away from his once care free face and whispered those dreaded words

"Goodbye"

Jacob lent forward and began to kiss her and she kissed him back first hard and passionate, then slower as if a deadly venom spread from that last painful kiss. He pushed her away hard and she tripped falling back onto that sofa, he began to shake violently as he ran, ran from the room, from the house, from his rejected love, his burning, dying heart and Bella watched through the window as the figure of a tall teenage boy changed to that of a wolf disappearing into the horizon.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2- a dark truth 

Bella sat on her bed and stared at the opposite wall. She felt too drained of emotion to cry, she ran a cold hand through her hair and sighed. When Bella got back, shed had a massive fight with Charlie, it was her fault really, not that shed admit it any time soon, but he'd been bugging her about her "love" life again and shed flipped out. Bella reached for her Mobil next to her bed, flipped it open and scrolled through the contacts. Her heart jumped when she saw Edwards name, a twist of that invisible knife hed left in her chest. Before she could get to Jacob however, his name flashed up on the screen. She answered the call with a nervous gulp. "Hello" she said shakily.

"Hi" Jacob muttered. "Listen I'm sorry about earlier…" Bella spoke before he could continue.

"Don't be, this is all my fault" she began to sob dryly.

"Please don't cry"

She pulled herself together.

"So" she continued with a deep breath "were still friends, right?" Bella suddenly realised how tactless that sounded and rephrased. "If you don't want to speak to me anymore I understand, but I don't want to loose you"

Jacob cut in. "you'll never loose me, I still love you and always will" he paused, but Bella stayed silent so he continued "I was kinda hoping we could still be together, you know as a couple"

"Ummm" she was swamped with guilt.

"I don't care if you don't love me, you mean everything to me, I can't give you up"

"Ok Jake"

"Thank you Bella"

She felt sickened by herself. "I have to go now, bye"

"Bye, I love you"

"Love you to" she muttered and snapped the phone shut.

How could she keep doing this to him, was she that stupid, that bloody selfish. She lay back on her bed and stared at the plain blank ceiling, unmoving until she fell asleep hours later, caught in a restless dream.

**********

Edward stared down at his hands, his marble white skin becoming almost reflective in the moon light. There were small flecks of crimson on his fingers, _I'm getting messy_, he thought. Licking off the residue of his last meal. He stared down at the body of an unknown pedophile who had been following a drunken school girl. He scooped the lifeless, bloodless body up and ran a mere blur in the dark of the night, into cover of a forest. The thick green trees loomed over him about as intimidating as mike Newton. He began clawing at the wet earth so he could bury the body and as he worked he thought back over the last few months. He had cared about Bella but, not enough, he had hurt her and he regretted it. She had been his "bit on the side," but Bella thought he loved her, love he thought, what a stupid, flexible word. Anyway as far as he knew she and the dog, Jacob were now an item and Edward, well he had just broken up with his current girlfriend Tanya, who was in a state of depression, none of the girls from her clan would speak to him, not that it bothered him the only reason they didn't drink human blood was because, they were sluts who didn't want to kill the human guys they sleep with. The hole he was digging, (now more than deep enough) grew deeper still as he attempted to vent his anger and self loathing. The worst part of all this though, the thing which had driven Carlisle to kick him out, his siblings to hate him and had made him turn back to drinking human blood was when he tried to kiss Rosalie. It shouldn't have happened but, everyone was out hunting except him and Rose, he was bored and she was there, showing off, dressed like a slag, wearing a short red skirt and a tight low cut top, she was apparently "saving for Emmet" yer sure what does she expect. Edward looked up and sighed the hole was now about as deep as Emmet's loathing for him. Edward scrabbled out easily and kicked the body in, he refilled the hole, with in 30 seconds it was identical to the patch of ground Edward had chosen before hed started digging. A gust of wind blew but of course the chill died on his on already frozen skin.


End file.
